One Saturday morning, I discovered โAlbertโ had escaped its pen in the backyard. I was looking for it when I heard loud screams from our neighborโs wife, Mrs. Dorsa.
Her husband had neglected mowing the backyard for a few weeks, and while she was hanging laundry out to dry, she had stepped on Albert!
Guess I was lucky she didnโt have a heart attack!
Goodbye to Albert, and for the rest of the summer, you could spot a hummingbird egg in the crew-cut grass of their backyard!
SONNY PUNCH
Lafayette
Feeling fuelish
Dear Smiley: I was 17 when we moved to Marietta, Ohio. My parents had to go back to finalize the sale of our old houseย
โMy mother was driving a 1960 Chrysler Valiant and gave me strict instructions not to drive it while she was gone.
With my fingers crossed behind my back, I promised.
She uncovered my deception almost as soon as she got back. It seems I had put too much gasoline in her car.
RUSS WISE
LaPlace
Save the dolls
Dear Smiley: When I was between 2 and 3, it was wartime and my dad was in the Air Force. We lived in Leavenworth, Kansas.
My mother was close to her New Orleans family, and we took the train back there quite a bit.
One morning we were running late and ran for the train. I was bundled up in my pink snowsuit and fell as my mother boarded the train.
As I fell I could have put my arms out to catch myself, but I might tear the paper dolls I was carrying in my arms. So I landed face down.
My dad scooped me up, jumped on the train, deposited me with my mother and jumped off the moving train.
If you don't know what paper dolls are, ask your grandma.
SUSAN HUNT
New Orleans
Initial reaction
Dear Smiley: I got a chuckle Friday reading about cellphones.
I have given my phone a name. I call it my ILCD. When I get that quizzical look from people, I explain it stands for Irritating Little Communication Device. Everyone seems to agree!
JIM STEPHENS
Slidell
Childspeak revisited
Dear Smiley: Years ago, my son Ross, then 3 to 5 years old, had a knack for creating words. As doting parents do, we quickly adopted such words into our family vernacular.
One day, while trying to tie his truck to a wagon, his frustration rose until the word "Pootysquats!" was invented.
We all fell out in laughter, immediately adopted the word, and used it when irritated.
I was at work with several of my co-workers nearby when, struggling with a task, "pootysquats" came out of my mouth.
Of all the words adults use to state their dissatisfaction, I used that one in front of my co-workers. After explanation, the parents in the group understood. But I still got my share of weird looks for a few days.
ALAN R. CRNKO
Holden
Write Smiley at smiley@theadvocate.com. He can also be reached by mail at P.O. Box 2304, Baton Rouge, LA 70821.
