Mention of the all-knowing nature of telephone operators in years past reminded me of an event in the mid-'60s, when I was doing public relations for the ¶¶Òõh Farm Bureau Federation.
I had an afternoon meeting in Crowley, and arrived there around noon. Before fast-food joints appeared on every corner, most towns had a downtown mom-and-pop cafe where locals gathered for plate lunches.
Not seeing one as I pulled into town, I found a pay phone and called the local operator. The conversation went like this:
Operator: "May I help you?"
Me: "Yes, I just got in town and I'm looking for a good lunch place."
"Uh, I'm sorry, I don't know one…"
"Well, where do you have lunch?"
"At my mama's."
"OK, where does your mama live?"Â Â
After a pause, she started laughing. I thanked her and resumed my lunch hunt.Â
Divine intervention
Wednesday's altar boy story about a cork breaking off in a bottle of wine reminds Bill Huey, of Baton Rouge, "of the time we almost poisoned a priest.
"The altar wine at Sacred Heart came in big glass jugs, and when I was pouring for the next Mass, the jug ran out.
"I checked the closet and got another jug, filling the cruets. About that time the sacristan, Mr. Comeaux, came in, saw the jug, and said, 'Where did you get that jug?'
"'From the closet,' I said. Mr. Comeaux's eyes bulged. 'That's floor wax!' he said.
"We washed the cruets as quickly as we could and refilled them. After the first pour of the wine, the priest (visiting from Holland) returned to the side of the altar and said, 'Da vine tastes funny.'
"I thought, 'Buddy, you don't know how close you came.'"
Mama's list
We had a story of a youthful confession on Wednesday. Here's another one, from Brenda Atkinson, of Baton Rouge:
"Bishop Stanley Ott, a former bishop of the Baton Rouge Diocese, told this story.
"When he was hearing the confessions of first graders, preparing for their First Communion, one little boy didn't say anything for the longest time.
"Finally Bishop Ott asked him what he wanted to say. The little penitent said, 'It's too dark in here. I can't read what my mama wrote.'"
MawMaw's candy
"Articles about childhood days take me back to when I was a little boy spending time at my MawMaw and PawPaw's house in Boudreaux Canal," says Yogi Naquin, of Bayou Blue.
"I would play and nap on the front porch, eat a few plums out back, and drink water from the cistern. I would go across the street and get a piece of ice from PawPaw at the ice plant where he worked.
"Once I was in the house, opened the icebox and saw a piece of chocolate. I broke off a piece and started to eat it when MawMaw stopped me and made me spit it out.
"It was her Ex-Lax. I never touched chocolate in her icebox again."Â
Mr. Multitalented
Ronnie Abboud says grandson Ross "Sticks" Abboud and the team from Vandebilt Catholic High, Houma, are off to the World Championship Percussion Competition in Dayton, Ohio, after winning a ¶¶Òõh-Mississippi contest.
Ross also portrayed Jesus in Vandy's Passion Play.
Special People Dept.
— Lessleen Owen, of Lafayette, celebrates her 95th birthday Thursday, April 13. She is a retired Realtor.
— Nelson Stein, of Brusly, celebrates his 90th birthday Thursday, April 13.
— Bill and Billy Lewis, of Baton Rouge, celebrate their 70th anniversary Thursday, April 13.
Noisy guy
Catherine Altazan, of Port Allen, says, "My husband and I are of the age when some movements take more effort than most. Recently, I asked Jim why he had to make so much noise getting out of his recliner.
"He responded, 'Well, I guess it’s because I’m a groanÌý³¾²¹²Ô!'â€